So,
I was browsing the blogs and ran across an interesting read (can't remember the blog now, but when I do I'll post his link..). Anyway, one of the blogs spawned comments that lead to an age old debate: 'a hoe or not'. There was question about if you are dating someone, do you share your 'number' or not. If you don't share your number does that make you 'slutty' or 'whore-ish' by default? If you DO share your number and it was a GIGANTIC number from your past, are you STILL that 'slut puppy' from then or are you the you now?
My take on this is:
If you are dating someone, don't ask about a stupid 'number of past partners'. I think it's perfectly okay to talk about safe sex practices. I mean I don't really wanna know that the dreamy guy I'm dating has slept with 100 women!!!! However, I'd certainly like to know that if he did sleep with that many, that he wrapped his 'member' up each time... that's more important to me than the number. I'm afraid the number would 'scare me off' or 'put up walls' to knowing a POTENTIALLY good guy now who USED to be a man-whore.
This is the hypothetical scenario I pose when in this kind of discussion:
You are let's say 40 years old, single and looking. You meet a 35 year old. You guys hit it off very well, date for months and months and months. You two decide to go 'further' with your relationship by introducing sex, so of course the 'sex' talk comes into the convo more often. Let's say, you two decide to discuss numbers. Let's say the woman who is 35, admits to sleeping with 30 men in her youner days. Are you now turned off? Do you wanna know more? If she continues to say "yeah, I had a pretty tough teenage and young adult life. I didn't know my self worth and self value. I was looking for someone to love me and I too often transposed 'sex' for the 'love' I was seeking. That was a sad time in my life when I was about 17-21, but I've been celibate now for about 7 straight years. I've grown so much. I know my worth and my value now... and well, I haven't had sex with anyone yet because I haven't found anyone I've deemed worthy enough of me.. until maybe now'. What now? Is she still a hoe? Is she 'redeemed'? What?
What is that 'magic' number that solidifies one as a 'whore'? I mean to some more than 3 could mean the biggest whore in the world! To some more than 20 wouldn't matter at all... so again I ask.. What is a Hoe? (or Whore for everybody who refuses to read and use 'slang' LOL)
I was browsing the blogs and ran across an interesting read (can't remember the blog now, but when I do I'll post his link..). Anyway, one of the blogs spawned comments that lead to an age old debate: 'a hoe or not'. There was question about if you are dating someone, do you share your 'number' or not. If you don't share your number does that make you 'slutty' or 'whore-ish' by default? If you DO share your number and it was a GIGANTIC number from your past, are you STILL that 'slut puppy' from then or are you the you now?
My take on this is:
If you are dating someone, don't ask about a stupid 'number of past partners'. I think it's perfectly okay to talk about safe sex practices. I mean I don't really wanna know that the dreamy guy I'm dating has slept with 100 women!!!! However, I'd certainly like to know that if he did sleep with that many, that he wrapped his 'member' up each time... that's more important to me than the number. I'm afraid the number would 'scare me off' or 'put up walls' to knowing a POTENTIALLY good guy now who USED to be a man-whore.
This is the hypothetical scenario I pose when in this kind of discussion:
You are let's say 40 years old, single and looking. You meet a 35 year old. You guys hit it off very well, date for months and months and months. You two decide to go 'further' with your relationship by introducing sex, so of course the 'sex' talk comes into the convo more often. Let's say, you two decide to discuss numbers. Let's say the woman who is 35, admits to sleeping with 30 men in her youner days. Are you now turned off? Do you wanna know more? If she continues to say "yeah, I had a pretty tough teenage and young adult life. I didn't know my self worth and self value. I was looking for someone to love me and I too often transposed 'sex' for the 'love' I was seeking. That was a sad time in my life when I was about 17-21, but I've been celibate now for about 7 straight years. I've grown so much. I know my worth and my value now... and well, I haven't had sex with anyone yet because I haven't found anyone I've deemed worthy enough of me.. until maybe now'. What now? Is she still a hoe? Is she 'redeemed'? What?
What is that 'magic' number that solidifies one as a 'whore'? I mean to some more than 3 could mean the biggest whore in the world! To some more than 20 wouldn't matter at all... so again I ask.. What is a Hoe? (or Whore for everybody who refuses to read and use 'slang' LOL)
I wouldn't know about 'that' type of thing. not been married an' all.
ReplyDeleteTo be honest i find the concept of 'intemate sharing' obscene if it is not for the sole purpose of further overpopulating the world.
Hang on a second i think i got posessed for a moment. for me it comes down to a few simple questions. are you single, are you clean? why murk perfect moments with jealousy enducing questions, the past is over the present is everything and the future a possibility.
mark
I'm with you on this one: the 'number' isn't important. The only thing that matters is trust and safety (and sure, if you've got an STD, don't keep it in the dark). As to what a hoe is...well, if you can use him/her to weed your garden, then they're a hoe :-). I think you have it right: there is no set definition. However, to most people I think it's more than just past sexual partners; I think there's the degree of casual sex or cheating, amongst other things. Thanks for the read!
ReplyDeleteMark- I was about to be embarassed for posting this! LOL glad I finished reading it though...
ReplyDeleteStephen- LOL@ 'if you can get him/her to weed your garden, then they're a hoe' LOLL loved it!
Thanks for taking a moment to stop by my little pink palace!
You gave a great scenerio...which simply says that people can change no matter what they've been through in their past. I don't think the number of partners should be discussed as it either gives the other person something to hold over your head to bring up in the future or will cause him or her look at you differently.
ReplyDelete